Sex & Fun: A Menual for Man

Since this is a very polarizing topic, I’ve decided to break this down into various groups of thought, and since I’m sure this is being read because of the title, the breakdowns/bullet points are for ease of navigation.  You may be a master at the pre-game but are bad at finishing, so hopefully this helps to cure these whoa’s. The topics to be covered will be:

  1. Small Talk – The Introduction
  2. For Play
  3. Penetration
  4. Satisfaction
  5. The Next Morning


Small Talk –

Let me be clear, this is probably one of the singularly most important steps when addressing the topic of Sex, and honestly, probably the easiest to overlook.

Where does one begin when approaching or introducing yourself to a polarizing and intimidating subject? I’ll tell you, with conversation that makes it appear smaller than it is.  We need to understand that using large words is unnecessary to sound smart, and honestly, if you need to sound smart then you’re probably reading the wrong bullet point, because small talk is not smart.  When addressing a subject that is new, foreign or obviously out of your league, phrases such as “I understand”, “It makes total sense” and “Tell me more…” are all very acceptable responses, but will most likely get you ignored for the remainder of the evening; instead try asking “Why?”, “How long?” or state your favorite position and leave it at that, asking questions is always engaging and filters out those who are atomically a waste of space.  It is absolutely necessary to keep a closed mind at this point of the conversation, showing any sort of openness to understanding is a recipe for the friendzone, and let’s be honest…it’s not why we’re here.

For Play –

Let me be clear, this is probably one of the singularly most important steps when addressing the topic of Sex, and honestly, probably the easiest to overlook..

If this has never been your strong suit, then I’m glad you’re here because it’s actually quite simple and has the potential to be incredibly pleasing, as well as a way to lengthen the fun if premature departure is an issue.  If you’re awesome at this, then you’ve advanced to Fore Play, so move onto the next section.

For Play is where you should begin to open your mind, you need to have an imagination because if done improperly, the subject will most likely become toxic and at that point, nobody wants to be around.  It also makes it very awkward for the other people that are around, and a reminder as to why they don’t invite you to many places.  The idea here is finger and tongue control, you may get creative but be sure your subject agrees with what you’re saying or pointing out, playing with tangents will allow you to briefly touch the outside, but you’ll never become a part of the circle, and isn’t that the point of this?  If done properly, there should be a bunch of laughter and a warming sensation should allow for greater comfort as well as further grasping of the subject.  Do not try to get too grabby, nobody likes a show off and it gives the impression of trying too hard for the sake of fitting in, and to say that size doesn’t matter is a lie, it does, but it’s ALSO how well you use it.  Be smart, be conservatively open to new concepts, if all goes well then you’ll hit the green and what started For Play will transform into Fore Play.  Game on!

Penetration –

Let me be clear, this is probably one of the singularly most important steps when addressing the topic of Sex, and honestly, probably the easiest to overlook.

First, let me say congratulations if you’ve made it this far! Don’t get too cocky though, you will end up disappointing and that may be the last time you see the subject, at least until it comes around again, but you won’t be welcome to partake and will set men back another 50 years.  No pressure though. This is the stage when you’re in! You’ve made it to the inner circle, or whatever shape it is, and let me tell you, this is the time to be open minded.  Don’t forget to pay attention, it’s still possible to ruin things, but being open minded at this point allows you to fully flesh out some of your points.  Keep in mind that it’s (not really) scientifically the best form of an exercise because you’re expelling the salty nonsense dribbling from your body and what remains is a sense of self worth and the mind blowing fact that equality on every level takes two, or more, to fulfill. It’s true, sometimes walls are involved and it can be pleasurable to be pinned down, if you’re a masochist, but it should feel rewarding on every level that you’ve been able to connect to a subject that you, as a Man, are never supposed to understand.  I mean come on, sex is confusing, except it’s not.It may be hard for us men, but in the end, it shouldn’t be; but this is not where it ends…

Satisfaction –

Let me be clear, this is probably one of the singularly most important steps when addressing the topic of Sex, and honestly, probably the easiest to overlook.

Remember, this is not the end.  If you’ve learned anything up to this point, it’s that the subject should never be forgotten.  Just because you’ve successfully penetrated the subject, does not make you a master nor does it mean you’ve fully explored all there is to know, in fact, you don’t know anything yet.  You’ve just gotten a taste, and expelled some of the water on your brain about a subject, but there’s more…much more learn.  Satisfaction is only temporary, and soon, there will be more, but you must be ready.  There will be new angles and positions to be thought about, new points of entry to be explored and if taken for granted even slightly, you’ll lose everything you’ve worked so hard to get to.  This level of success doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve got to cuddle up to the subject, it does, however, mean that a connection has been made.  It should be noted, in the case that if there is another, and they leave after this satisfying exercise, then they aren’t the one and you’ll probably have to find a new partner to share the subject with. Remember, satisfaction is only temporary, but if it was indeed satisfying, the subject will be penetrated again.

The Next Morning –

Let me be clear, this is probably one of the singularly most important steps when addressing the topic of Sex, and honestly, probably the hardest part to overlook.

So, you’ve gone a whole night and the subject is still around.  Questions will arise, do you feed it? Do you let it lay dormant or do you feed it and find out more about it? If this is your only concern, then you’re on the right track.  In an effort to understand, which everyone wants to be understood on some level, you need to feed the subject, you need to learn as much as you can, and you need to treat it more than a prop on your mantle.  There is no trophy for getting this far, and most likely, you’ll probably have more questions due to the new itch that must be scratched.  Your mind has just been blown by the subject, you kept an open mind and explored/discovered positions you had only heard about, you are probably sore from the Penetration stage, but it’s worth it because you’re now armed with a new experience, and new experiences increase your portfolio for Small Talk.  Be proud that the subject is still around for The Next Morning, and make sure to take care of it because it’s a sensitive subject.  Take what you learned and hopefully in the future, you will procreate new ideas from the subject, ones that lead to a better and more fulfilling life.

Treat the subject with reverence and respect, take care of it and don’t ever think you know everything.  Remember that there are multiple sides to every subject, and in dealing with others, you’ll have to deal with ignorance and narrow-minded folks.  That’s alright, they just haven’t reached the next morning yet.

Disclaimer – 

I by no means believe myself to be a master of the subject, in fact, the more I learn about it, the more I realize I don’t know.  I am, however, very open to learning and while I may joke or play devil’s advocate for the sake of pleasure, this is an important topic that should be discussed more often with open minds, open hearts and a bit of silliness.  Everything is until it isn’t, so remember progress requires all individuals.

Sub Disclaimer –

I welcome all to challenge my claims.  Start a conversation.



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